Summer Doldrums

I've noticed that, as the summer heats up and the days meld into one another, I have become less and less active out here in this blogging community that I have found.

The thoughts are harder to grasp at.
I have to scratch and dig and heave.
The raw emotions and passionate thoughts are not flowing like the river that they once were.
My mind has become an arrid wasteland.
Every so often a thought bumbles and rolls around inside my head and is quickly gone.
Much like the tumbleweed in a bad Western movie.
It makes its entrance.
Skitters across the screen.
And then it is gone.

The flame and flicker of my heart, my passionate heart
my often electric mind and spirit
is a tiny, dull blue flame.
It is still there.
Just not quite the presence it once was.

I stare at my blog page, my sidebar, and long for you all.
I long for your stories.
And I long to comment.
I find that it is all an immense effort.
To construct a post.
To comment properly.
Reading is the easy part.
It's just trying to get around to all of you whom I adore.
And to comment.

What I am finding though, is that many of you seem to be in a similar boat.
That there are larger gaps of time between posts.
Which is to be expected.
The summer is a busy time.

However, what I am detecting is a tired.
A blanket of blue.
Is that my perceptions/projections?
Or are a lot of just feeling.....


8 ripples in the pond:

flutter said...

It's freakin' hot, man.

but yes, malaise has been setting in, hasn't it?

maigh said...

I'm with ya, sister. Don't be too hard on yourself about it (advice I should listen to, damn the voices in my head!)...we'll be here when you're ready.

thailandchani said...

Yeah.. an element of "meh".

This past weekend is the first time I have simply ignored my blog, didn't respond to comments and was nearly indifferent to the whole thing.

And I needed to do that.. needed to take a break from it. It's not that I don't care about other community members whose blogs I read faithfully... (and even read them this weekend.. just didn't say anything) .. but when this starts to feel like work, I need to move away from it.

I won't claim "busy-ness" because it's not true for me. Staying in balance.. that's what I'm doing.. and acknowledging that it's slower than usual.. and matching the pace.

I'll continue to do a Friday post, the ones I call "Weekend".. and take the weekends off as long as I feel the need to do so.

Ok. I'm rambling. Ba! :)



carrie said...

You are going through a tremendous change and adjustment right now, so go easy on yourself!

As for me, if life wasn't kicking my ass -- I'd probably post more, but then again, maybe I'd just be spending more time at the beach reading trashy novels . . . who knows?

Either way, you gotta do what you gotta do. And for you, right now, that is taking care of YOU and your kiddos. This will be here, don't worry! :)


deb said...

Meh, sounds about right.

deb said...

I miss you Tabba, not trying to make you feel guilty, just letting you know I always enjoyed reading your blog. Hope things are well with you guys. I tried to email you but I've changed computers and haven't set up an email account other than my hotmail account so I'm using your comments to say hi.

Take care.

Oh, The Joys said...

Hey there!

Sorry you are in the doldrums and that I haven't been commenting much.

I have been traveling and my work is at a heightened stage of utter chaos. I hope things will settle down soon.


Seattle Mamacita said...

i'm the same way lately, just enjoying "living" my life instead of writing about it and i find that commenting too has been hard although i continue to read...
no worries