Ok Computer

The past few days, I've been feeding my blog obsession/narcissism by trying to learn more about blogging. I want a new look for my blog. I don't want to keep using this cookie-cutter design that blogger is kind enough to let me use. I want something better.
I've been doing google searches to try to learn how exactly I do this. And I've come up with this conclusion: I am an idiot.
Reading all of this computer jargon makes me feel like my head is going to explode. I have a hard time reading 'instructions' anyway (remember I've said that I'm a visual learner). I feel like I need to take a class to understand what exactly an RSS Feed is, what a blogroll is, what a ping is, how I get more people to read my blog, how I can get my own template, and the list goes on and on. You all are probably wondering how I even have a blog to begin with.....
If any of you have answers to these ridiculous questions, please, feel free to enlighten me. And, if you don't mind in your explanations, try spelling this stuff out as if you were talking to my 4-year-old.